It’s like she’s trying to take bad photos on purpose

If awkward family photos were a competitive sport, my mother would be a world champion. It’s not that she’s a bad photographer. She has taken some great photos. It’s that she likes taking pictures of people when they are are uncomfortable. When dropping me, my husband, and my kid off at the airport for a 13+ hour flight, she whipped out her camera as we were checking our bags and asked us to smile. Because the time spent fumbling with my passport, trying to keep a three-year-old by my side in a busy airport all while lifting a 50 pound bag is really a moment I want to capture forever.

Or she just doesn’t care what’s in the shot. Example: here is my back and my dad’s knees intruding on what I’m sure is supposed to be a picture of my kid playing with trains. Only you can’t really see him either.

backI accept the fact that  not all photos turn out well. But in the days of digital photography, you don’t need to save every picture. And you certainly don’t need to email me the duds along with the better shots.

My cousin got married today. It was a courthouse wedding thing, but my mom and I decided we had to make a big deal about it. We crashed the wedding, then his parents took us all out to lunch. Earlier in the day, my mom had been going through the basement and getting rid of things and found an old plastic Christmas tree. My cousin said he and his wife wanted it. So after lunch, my cousin, his wife, and their friend went to my mom’s car to pick up the disassembled fake tree in the mall parking lot. My mother, of course, decides that this–the newlyweds and their friend in a mall parking garage holding the pieces of a plastic tree while drivers waiting impatiently for us to vacate our spots–is a moment to cherish.

My mother hasn’t yet emailed me picture from the wedding, but I fully expect them to look like these (go to 20:10):

About emmawolf

I'm a freelance writer living in Baltimore with my husband, son, and two cats. I'm working on editing my first novel. I love reading, traveling, and the cello.
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2 Responses to It’s like she’s trying to take bad photos on purpose

  1. The photos in that “Ellen” album look like a collection of the worst “artistic” shots every hack wedding photographer ha ever tried. Hilarious. Thanks for the laugh!

  2. Tracy says:

    My husband does this – drives me insane!

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